Puns
by AusllyShipper101
Summary: A short oneshot about why Dez and Chuck hate each other, and how they constantly fight for more than just bragging rights to the winner.


**I don't own Austin and Ally.**

Dez wasn't one to dislike people. He got along with practically everyone. The word to notice in that sentence is practically. The one person Dez couldn't stand was standing right in front of him. He was currently frowning, because he'd just lost an argument.

"Sweet, sweet victory. Or should I say, my cake, my cake victory." Dez laughed evilly as he walked away.

Chuck.

That guy was nothing but trouble. They always fought. It wasn't a matter of who won more arguments, it was a matter of who would keep trying, who would never give up. And neither of them were about to give up.

Dez could distinctly remember the day Chuck had begun to hate him. They were in first grade, and the school had been having a "You can be anything you want to, always be yourself" kind of talk. Dez had decided that he wanted to embrace himself, become unique from every other kid at school. So he'd asked his mom to take him to the store, and he'd bought the most outrageous looking-clothing he could find. The next day, he walked into school, and what do you know; Chuck had had the same exact idea as Dez. At the time, Dez had more friends than Chuck, and because of that all the kids made fun of Chuck for copying Dez. So everyday after that, Chuck dressed up like a cowboy, his cowboy hat never leaving his side.

Dez could also remember the day that he had first started hating Chuck. Chuck had made a mean video making fun of Dez and his crazy clothes in sixth grade, and suddenly Dez's only friend was Austin. Ever since then they'd been having these pun wars, fighting to see who was smarter, and just overall being each others' nemesis.

But about a year ago, something had shifted. It wasn't that they'd realized that they should just stop fighting and keep the peace and blah, blah, blah. No, they had begun to fight for a reason. They had found a new reason to hate each other. But this time, there could only be one winner.

The thing that changed Dez and Chuck's fighting was a girl. A girl that they both liked, and were fighting over. She disliked both of them, so they never directly fought over her, but it was always there; a knowledge that they both wanted her. It simply gave them another reason to bash heads with each other.

A week later they had yet another pun war. Chuck came into Sonic Boom to buy a guitar, and naturally began a war with Dez.

"Hey, Dezperate. I see you've been fretting over your guitars." Chuck let out his signature laugh, that sounded more like an injured goat to Dez.

Dez rolled his eyes. "Don't string me along, Chuck." He grinned. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Trish smile. This only deepened Chuck's frown. Dez was clearly winning, and Chuck would not have that.

"You know, red, you should be more chordious to your customers!' Chuck smirked. He was back on, although it wasn't very satisfying since Trish was simply rolling her eyes at him.

"Oh yeah? Well maybe I like picking on you!"

This time, Trish smiled slightly bigger than the last time. Chuck began to fume. Dez was ruining his pride and his chances with being Trish's boyfriend. Then again, maybe both those problems were his own fault. He did dress like a cowboy.

"You're awful high-strung, you know."

"Maybe so, but at least I'm very sharp, whereas you seem quite diminished." Dez high-fived Trish, who was laughing by now.

Chuck scowled, and having no more puns in mind, walked away.

"That was awesome!" Trish said, still laughing.

"I have a gift." Dez said overdramatically with a sweep of his arm. Trish laughed again. "Want to go get a smoothie to celebrate?" Trish nodded with a grin.

While the two were out, Chuck was walking through the mall when he saw them at the same table. He fumed with anger, and ran over to them.

"Hey Red! You prepared for a war?"

Dez's eyes narrowed. "Bring it."

"Catagory." This was the process they usually went through; they picked a topic, and the war began.

"How about cheese?" Dez said, his eyes never leaving Chuck's.

Chuck pointed to a sign. "They have smoothies here? No whey!"

Dez snorted. "No whey, Gouda one."

"Give me a lot of cheese and I'll Edam all." Chuck was grinning. Trish looked back and forth between the boys, confused but also trying not to laugh at their puns.

Dez rolled his eyes. "Curd I compete with someone fetta than you at puns?"

"Nope. Just let is brie."

Dez was silent for a second, than sprang up, saying, "Cheese-whiz, Chuck-E, are you even speaking American?"

Chuck was once again rendered silent. He turned around, and just before he left, he said to Dez, "You got skills and a pretty lady, your a lucky guy."

And Dez was. He had three great best friends who would always support him no matter how wacky he was. And Trish had begun to act nicer to him recently. As they left the smoothie shop that night, Trish gave Dez a kiss on the cheek.

"You are an awesome at punning." With that, she went home.

**Was it horrible? I got the inspiration, obviously, from FF&FF. PS. I only looked up some of these puns. A bunch of them I made up :) Review, and I hope you liked it!**

**-GG**


End file.
